Recently, I have been taking a class with my church
entitled, Emotional Healthy Spirituality. The course syllabus, if you will, is
filled with exercises and practices to help you become more emotionally mature
so that you may become more spiritually mature. During one of the first few
classes we were given an info graphic with a “feeling wheel” on it. It was a
colored pie chart with six basic emotions listed in the center such as mad and
sad. As you move out from the center of the pie, more detailed and descriptive
emotions are listed, such as hostile, remorseful, or apathetic. In order to
dive into the class, I wanted to start cataloging my feelings every day.
After a few
days I was starting to notice a pattern; I would come home and sit down to
describe the day, but all I could come up with was “good” or “fine”. However,
good and fine aren’t on the feeling wheel. It wasn’t long after this puzzle
that I began to see that I do not usually understand how I feel, or rather that
I don’t take the time to feel. Most days I come to end feeling numb and
dormant, almost like I am not really living. Like many, I go through the
motions without feeling the emotions.
This self-knowledge really scared me. I didn’t want to “live” while not really living.
The beauty
of Clifton StrengthsFinder is that it shows us who we are at our most natural
self. I have noticed that many people around me lead with Empathy. Clifton StrengthsFinder
says “people strong in the Empathy theme can sense the
feelings of other people by imagining themselves in others' lives or others'
situations.” So, not only can those with Empathy feel, they can actually feel the feelings of others.
I see the
power of Empathy as its ability to help others understand what they are
feeling. Even though I cannot put a name to my feelings (yet), when I am around
my roommate, coworkers, or any number of the hundreds of mentors in our
program, who lead with Empathy, I can understand my own feelings through them.
Simply through the power of their strength, those with Empathy help people like
me, not only to better understand ourselves, but also the world around us.
People with Empathy take me from a numb human to one that is alive, experiencing
and feeling life, complete with the
good, the bad, and the ugly.
-Tess
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