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Relator: Trust & Loyalty

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People exceptionally talented in the Relator theme enjoy close relationships with others. They find deep satisfaction in working hard with friends to achieve a goal.
Clifton StrengthsFinder

Those high in Relator value close relationships. They derive their greatest energy from being close with other people. For Relators, there is no end destination to relationships; there is always more ways to grow deeper in friendship. Gallup writes, “You know that this kind of closeness implies a certain amount of risk-that you might be taken advantage of-but you are willing to accept that risk.” Those high in Relator do not just enjoy deep relationships, but also enjoy when they are able to work with their friends towards a common goal.  

At TeamMates’ 2016 Annual Partnership, our Keynote Speaker, Paul Thelen said, “Relationships move at the speed of trust.” For someone with Relator, this is innate to how they build relationships. Trust and loyalty are the bedrock of relationships; however, this does not mean it comes easily.
Relators know that it takes time and effort to build these relationships; trust doesn’t just develop overnight. Consequently, Relators have a tight circle of friends. Once a person with Relator has let you into their circle, they see it as a long-term commitment. When talking with those high in Relator, you usually find that many still keep in contact with childhood friends. To Relators, friendship is a lifelong journey.


18.2% of mentees and 20.7% of mentors have Relator in their Top 5 Strengths. TeamMates, in practice is rooted in a “Relator” mindset. We ask mentors to commit to a minimum of three years with their mentee, with the hopes of following them through high school graduation. Even if Relator is not high for you, you are already utilizing the Relator theme in your mentoring relationship. Whether you are six months or six years into your mentoring journey, be courageous to be real with your mentee. Share with them struggles you may be facing or obstacles you have overcome; research shows that by sharing power with your mentee, you will build a stronger and deeper relationship. To implement more intentional strengths based conversation with your mentee, consider talking about other relationships you have. What works well? What doesn’t? What have you learned about someone by being their friend? What have you learned about yourself through friendships? Spend time writing letters to friends, coworkers, or family members that you don’t talk to often. Share something with each other that other people might not know. By being genuine and open with your mentee, you will be honoring the Relator theme while deepening your relationship. 

-Tess
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