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A Look at Relator


People exceptionally talented in the Relator theme enjoy close relationships with others. They find deep satisfaction in working hard with friends to achieve a goal.  
CliftonStrengths

This week, our guest blogger is Dawn Stock. Dawn has been the Program Coordinator of TeamMates of Doniphan-Trumbull for the last three years. In addition, she has been mentoring since 2013, seeing her initial mentee through graduation and beyond.   Her top 5 strengths are Relator, Harmony, Responsibility, Adaptability, and Arranger. Here’s what Relator looks like for Dawn:




One of the biggest struggles for me is speaking in front of a large group of people. I KNOW I can do it, but the build up makes me want to bolt.  However, if you put me in front of two or three people that are engaged, I thrive.  That’s what a “Relator” means to me.  It’s someone that enjoys the close, personal conversations with people in a one-to-one or small group setting.  It’s about asking questions, hearing about their life, sharing stories of my life and ultimately taking something away from it in the end.  Fortunately, being in a small school like Doniphan-Trumbull, I get to use my Relator strength on a daily basis.  I don’t get the opportunity to do big group trainings with my mentors so most of my trainings are one to one, sometimes at a coffeeshop, going over all the “fun stuff” I’m supposed to go over but also getting to know that mentor personally.  I feel it’s during that time I truly form a relationship with the mentor in my program and can place them with the right mentee.  After that, the door to my office is always left open so I can continue to catch mentors and mentees as they pass by and build relationships from there.  I can honestly say, I have made some great friendships just from the meetings initiated by my coordinator job.  However, in my personal life, I am very selective on who I would call my “true” friends.  I hold loyalty and trust in a high regard so I am very careful on who I let in.  I believe this is also a trait of a Relator.  Our circle of friends are small but mighty.  

My top 5 strengths are Relator, Harmony, Responsibility, Adaptability and Arranger.  It is amazing to me how all 5 of my strengths describe me to a tee.  I am the person who loves to do all the “behind the scenes” work without being in the limelight.  I created a yearly event at our local church called PLAH day, People Lend A Hand, where members of our church go out in the community and help people with things they can’t do on their own, like yard work, moving furniture or cleaning windows.  Then there are other teams that do random acts of kindness around town. This highlights my Arranger and Responsibility strengths.  I am very involved in our local youth group finding weekly lessons and getting games organized. I am also the President of the Music Boosters program at our local high school so I am closely involved with all things in the band and choir department.  All of these roles bring me joy, sometimes a little stress, but allow me to showcase my top 5 strengths. 

Growing up, my mom was a single mom and worked the night shift as an RN at the hospital.  My grandparents only lived 6 blocks away from me and I spent the night at their house a lot.  I had a special relationship with both of them but especially my grandma.  We spent many days in the kitchen where she taught me to make homemade noodles, runzas, and all types of pies.  In that kitchen, I got to hear all the stories of my grandma’s life that made her who she was.  She not only taught me the art of good cooking, she taught me the art of good conversation, which I believe developed my Relator strength.  To this day, one of my favorite places to be is in the kitchen, now with my own daughter. 

I jump at the chance to go to lunch or go on a walk with a close friend.  To me, this is a time where I can truly let go and be myself.  I have a friend whose mother is going through the stages of Alzheimer’s so each week, whether it’s a phone call, a lunch date, or a glass a wine, I make a point to talk to her so she can vent.  We share lots of laughs and tears and she has many moments of anger. I love that I can be that person for her and can tell she feels better after she unloads the stress.  Maybe, in my case anyway, that’s what being a Relator is.  It’s like being a counselor, a shoulder to lean on.  I like that role.    
-Dawn

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