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The Best Gift to Give

Yesterday, Ally and I were in Plattsmouth, NE for their Strengths Day. I kicked off the morning with a training at 7am with 10 mentors. As I walk talking about strengths, I was explaining the Student Success Model from Gallup. Since it was Boss's Day, an example came to me regarding the parallel to the workplace.

I talked about the difference between two bosses I have had. One boss, from a previous job I had in college who was very laid back and aloof. He was concerned with his own work and outcomes. My work contributed to that, so every once in a while, I would have interactions that were not that negative, but also not encouraging. He would say things such as "where are you at with this project, would you be able to get it to me quicker?" Beyond checking in and asking about my work, our interactions did not go very far. I wanted to have further conversations, but it did not seem like he had the time nor the desire to do so. He was not a bad boss at all, but rather met the requirements for being a supervisor.

If this previous boss met the requirements for being a supervisor, my current boss sets the gold standard. She listens, wants to know about me and my work, as well as pushes me to be a better version of myself. She course-corrects me when necessary, not in a corrective manner, but in an instructive manner, showing me where I could improve and helping me see outside of my own perspective. This boss sees a better version of me and helps me realize it.

My current boss is a mentor to me. She is what we hope that all mentors are for their mentees. It is what we aim to do when we introduce strengths into the mentoring relationship. Strengths isn't a "patch" or a "fix it" for a bad relationship. If strengths had been introduced to me at my first job, I likely would not have received it well from that boss. Introducing strengths into the mentoring relationship is designed to take a pre-existing, healthy, adult-to-student relationship and enhance it. It is meant to take you from a mentor to a champion.

Can we be more like my boss? Instead of going to meet your mentee and thinking, " gosh, she's late again" or "geez, he needs better manners", let's think "I am so glad they came today", or "I can't believe I get to be a part of  the life of this kiddo." Our mentees do not need another adult correcting their behavior or being disengaged from their life, they need an advocate and a champion; someone who sees the best version of them and helps to make that a reality. The best gift we could ever give our mentees is just that- showing up and calling out their potential.

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